-Wendy Liebman

One of the problems with this economy is that if you're lucky enough to have a job, you have to live with the burden of being Lucky To Have a Job. Implicit in being one of the Lucky Ones is "shut up and be grateful", which is no one's first choice in the luck lottery.

Meanwhile, managers themselves keep getting asked to give just a bit more effort, to put in a bit more time. The problem is that they've been doing a bit more, year after year, crisis after crisis for a decade or two. Let's review the math of "just a bit more": If you work 40 hours a week and you're asked to put in an extra ten percent, in ten years time you're at 104 hours (which is 15 hours a day, seven days a week). It's your investments that are supposed to compound, not your workweek. (Compounding uninterest?)

What got me thinking about the dual-stress of the modern workplace was reading the news reports about job satisfaction stats reaching a new low. So I decided it was time to update my pair of lists of boss-employees annoyances. Let's start with the list of employees' frustrations…

REASONS WHY YOUR EMPLOYEES SECRETLY HATE YOU


• Using the word "teamwork" when you really mean "overwork without complaint or compensation."
• Treating kindness as if it were a scary virus that might spread to others – "If I did it for you, I'd have to do it for everyone."
• Calling to "check in."
• Offering distant and vague rewards: "No promises, but something good is coming."
• Complaining about the cost of repairs for your "Beemer."
• Prattling on about being a team when your real goal is to get a big promotion and leave the team behind.
• That face you make.

And, on the other side, let's recall what it is that managers find annoying about their employees…

REASONS WHY YOUR BOSS SECRETLY HATES YOU


• Saying "FINALLY!" to any announcement of a positive change.
• Mistaking a thought for an idea, an idea for a proposal and a proposal for an innovation. (An idea is to an innovation what the sex act is to raising a child.)
• Asking for advice when what you really want is to pass off problems or responsibilities.
• Being miserable but not having the guts to do something about it.
• Pretending not to understand.
• Mistaking the boss for a wealthy and gullible relative.
• Reacting to an attempt to the company doing something nice for employees by saying, "I'd rather they just give us the money it cost."
• That face you make.

What's needed from both sides is to assume the best about the other, even when you know better. Perhaps that's what it means to be a professional: Show up – I mean really show, all in – and force yourself to assume the best (which means you don't get to make that face).

©2010 by King Features Syndicate, Inc.

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DEALING WITH DUMB DECISIONS

Dear JT & Dale:
I recently read your comments about "micromanagers." I work for one. During the cold winter months, while traveling within the metro area, he orders me to leave the motor vehicle unattended with the motor running. I once had a battery removed from my own vehicle, and the thought of a whole vehicle being stolen is too real for me to ignore. Would I be on safe ground to say NO without being accused of insubordination?
-Damon

DALE: No, no, no – you mustn't say no to a micromanager. It's insecurity that causes a manager to go "micro," so any direct challenge would end poorly.

JT: Instead, "suggest" to your boss that leaving the car running is not a good idea. Perhaps something like, "Maybe I'm just hypersensitive, but I had a car battery stolen and I'd hate to see the whole car stolen." The key is to frame it in such a way that your boss can change his mind without looking foolish.

DALE: I would go further because, to a micromanager, changing his mind IS looking foolish. Two suggestions:

1. Learn the art of ignoring idiot instructions. The key to this is to have a good excuse prepared, so that if you get caught, you can explain that you were NOT ignoring the rule, just making an exception. Thus, if the boss discovers you shut the car off, you say, "I always leave it running, but there were some creepy-looking guys hanging around, and I thought I should take the keys." That's safe ground.

2. Wait for the right moment and lead your boss to a revelation. For instance, the next time employees are asked for suggestions on cutting costs, you mention that UPS and others cut the engine whenever leaving the truck as a way to save fuel.

JT: I like that second option -- you aren't disagreeing or arguing, you're just putting the boss in a position to make a new and better decision. That's a great example of learning to "manage up."

Dear JT & Dale:
I'm a manager with a staff of seven. The other day our General Manager pulled me aside and started asking odd questions. Apparently an employee had called our corporate office anonymously and reported that I am doing my job improperly, even committing fraud. My GM knows that I am not like that, but she has to do her job, and now that I've been warned and written up I am one strike away from being let go. Should I confront this "anonymous" employee or let it slide?
-Bill

JT: My concern is that you were written up. This means that your boss/company feels you were in error.

DALE: Or, it could simply be that the boss felt that she couldn't be seen as ignoring the issue. Nevertheless, the first thing to do is to take your boss aside and find out exactly how she's feeling about the incident. Then, even if she's sympathetic, do not ignore it. Suspicions are like roaches -- just because you don't see them doesn't mean they are gone. No, they're there, in the shadows, reproducing.

JT: Yuck. And though I hate to extend that metaphor, you have to do more than a single spraying. I would plan a series of meetings with your boss, seeking feedback, making sure she is clear that you are doing all the right things. Plus, find ways to improve relationships with your staff. The best way is to help each one with his or her career. When you invest in helping them achieve their goals, they are far less likely to turn against you.

DALE: Good advice. But even with them, I wouldn't ignore the accusations. Instead of confronting Anonymous, have private conversations with all your staff, confiding in them that someone felt you were acting inappropriately – there are no secrets in departments, they already know -- and ask if they saw anything that could give the mistaken impression of impropriety. They'll see that you were hurt by the accusation and that you are ready to defend your reputation, while clearing up any misperceptions about your intentions and your character.

Jeanine “J.T.” Tanner O’Donnell is a professional development specialist and founder of the consulting firm, jtodonnell.com.

©2010 by King Features Syndicate, Inc.